Health & Fitness or Melancholia?

Case Study of Fr Fred

by Maria Hubert

Fr Fred is a real person and his situation a real situation. Names are changed and with his kind permission I reprint this for the help of others who will find many identifying points with Fred!

Fr Fred is a cheerful gregarious fun loving priest in his mid fifties. He loves everyone and everyone loves him. The sort of parish priest no-one ever wants to lose. A real father to his flock, and a friend to all.

Fred, like many priests, lives on a very small stipend. So he accepts the requests to do a little chaplaincy here and there, Mass at the school, at the convent. A skilled teacher, he gives several classes a week in the local college, and is the Classicist at the Seminary, so has to do the Latin and Greek lectures for the seminarians. Added to this his usual parochial duties.

Fred is fortunate in that he has a curate, an energetic ex-missionary of some seventy summers. He does the morning mass and confessions and helps generally around the parish. But still everyone depends on Fred. And Fred, in his own words feels ‘physical pain if he has to say no to anyone’

His parishioners are killing him with kindness. Knowing he is alone, they invite him to eat with them. Human nature getting in the way, one family vies with the next to, ‘ do Father proud’. Rich food, high in cholesterol. Fred’s one indulgence is food. He loves it! A boy from a poor background, he was always hungry, and so the height of joy to this kindly man is a good meal! Fred is not a drinker. He likes water, and then a few drops of warm spirit to wash around his coffee cup, ‘It makes my mouth feel clean after a fatty meal’ he would say.

Neither would he say he was a smoker.’ I gave up smoking twenty years ago, and apart from a small cigar on a special occasion I have not smoked since’ He will proudly announce.

Then one sad day, Fred has a stroke. Not a life threatening one. Not even a crippling one. But bad enough to make his memory and his self confidence take a dive. He had a scare. His doctor told him he had to lose weight, cut fat out of his diet.

‘What about drink?’

‘I don’t’

‘Smoke?’

‘Gave up twenty years ago’

A year later Fred is still overweight, still getting more and more flustered and increasingly and surprisingly irritated. His parishioners who have known him for years make allowances. ‘He is not well just now’ They will say. And humour his irrational comments.

This is where I came in. He realised he was not well, and asked my help. At first, to the surprise of his parish, I was his shadow, going with him to meals and events as his old friend from way back. Maybe some even entertained the idea that I was the latest in Fred's increasingly peculiar behaviour! But they saw that I was having some influence on him, and some of the closest friends came to me to say that they hopes I could talk to him as he did not listen to anyone else…..

At first I did nothing but observe. Fred was still eating like a horse. He refused the more obvious fatty foods, and sugary ones, but made a number of mistakes. At one family feast, he ate around 7,000 calories! Another day he accepted literally one inch of red wine in the bottom of his glass. But as he emptied it, it was refilled, and he, talking in his usual animated way to everyone, was oblivious of the fact.. He downed ten ‘inches’ and then saying, ‘As I have not been drinking all evening I can have my few drops of spirit to clean my mouth’ The few drops the men put in his coffee cup were equivalent to a double shot of 60% proof spirit, which he swilled around, still talking, and knocked back in one swallow.

Each day that week we had been invited to one meal after another, and at each one, the men put a cigar in front of Fred, a large cigar, which he smoked with relish, saying, ‘I don’t inhale the smoke you see so it is alright’.

At the end of a month I sat down with Fred and my notebook. And gave him the news. He was shocked ! He had not been aware that he had smoked six cigars in six days. He had no idea that he had drank so much alcohol, why he didn’t even care for wine. The addition of the calorie content of the food he had ‘carefully’ chosen was the biggest shock of all. ‘Take me in hand, nag me and keep on nagging me until I get it right’ he asked. This from a man who hates being told what to do was something really serious!

The doctors tell people to cut out their fats and sugars, to cut down on alcohol to stop smoking, but then its up to the patient to do those things and to teach themselves the values of foods etc. Many don’t. They simply obey the letter of the advice, without the understanding of food and nutrition..

I put Fred on a strict diet of white meat and fish, loads of salad and lightly cooked vegetables. I gave him carte blanche with fruit. It was to be his saving indulgence. ‘Eat as much as you want’.

‘But the doctor said no grapes, no bananas, no figs…’ The list went on.

‘Ignore it, you enjoy fruit, eat what you want, but observe the rest of the diet rigidly’ I advised. Twelve months later Fred is a fit and active 35kilos lighter. He walks three or four times a week for 20-30 minutes. If the weather is bad he has a walking machine. His diet is not so rigid, he has just enjoyed a pasta and Ice-cream filled holiday in Italy, backed up again with fruit and salads for filling. He has not taken a drop to drink nor a single puff of tobacco since that day I listed his habits! Great willpower!

We also looked at his workload. He has stopped teaching in college, and dropped one chaplaincy. His bishop has given him a smaller parish to manage, and he has enlisted the help of three retired priests who are delighted to feel useful and be able to cover the occasional Mass. He still keeps busy as the seminary Classicist, and saying masses in the convent and the school. He plans his day around a regular pattern. And at 65 he is fitter than many of his fellow priests ten years younger.

Best of all, his hospital tests and analysis show that he is healthier than he has been for more than ten years.

Fred's Daily Schedule

You can adapt this around your own parochial duties. Or contact me to help you plan your lifestyle for a healthier future.

7.30am Rise, Toilet, Fruit drink (to balance body sugars)

Brisk Walk for 20-30 minutes. (You may have to start more gently)

Shower.

Breakfast of Juice, cereal and fruit.

15 minutes sitting down to digest food.

Start days work.

Midmorning drink should be water or watered juice. Try Cranberry, it de-toxifies

Lunchtime

Boiled vegetables (lightly) or steamed

Fish any kind, but not fried

White meats, Chicken, Turkey, Rabbit

Lentils, Beans etc

Salads without dressing. Just a very little olive oil if too dry. Olive oil is good for the heart.

Avoid spicy sauces rich foods and fatty roasts and fries.

Drink plenty of water. You WILL get used to it after a while!

If possible have an after lunch rest At least half an hour. Research has proven that a good 60-90 minute sleep in the afternoon recovers the brain almost as much as a full night's sleep!

Office/admin work Parish work etc.

A cup of tea or decaf coffee and a couple of PLAIN biscuits if you are accustomed to teatime break

Supper no later than 8pm.

Balance meal to lunch. If you have had lots of veg at lunch have an omelette, a little low fat cheese, beans on toast, protein and calcium foods at supper. Or vice versa. Fruitjuice.

I know many priests have to go out to meetings in the evenings. Where possible ask for schedules to be made to fit in with your mealtime, if you have supper at 7pm for example, you could attend a meeting at 8.30pm. Aim to be home by 10pm, and relax over the news, a book or whatever for at least half an hour before you go to bed.

A cup of warm milk drink or a yogurt is a good night-food thing to have before bed.

If you follow this regime, I can guarantee that you will be feeling healthier and fitter within a twelve month. But if in doubt, please contact me, I shall be delighted to put you on the road to fitness.

Maria Hubert is a counsellor for Clergy, and also specialises in health and fitness and nutritional matters.